Match Profile: John and Khalil
Date: September 27, 2021
Little Brother Khalil, who is 14 and is in 8th grade, waited almost a year to be matched with his “perfect” Big Brother. His mom, Octavia, described Khalil as a leader, being quick-witted, intelligent, sporty, and bossy. His interests include video games, football, technology, YouTube videos, and STEM activities. Khalil shared that he wanted a Big Brother who was fun, someone who he could talk to, help him with homework, and that could play games with him.
Big Brother John is currently a security/defense contractor with Space and Naval Warfare command. John wanted to be a Big Brother because he had been a part of an informal mentorship relationship years ago and now considers his mentee a friend and brother. John was hoping to have a similar relationship through Big Brothers Big Sisters of the Lowcountry.
John and Khalil have been matched for almost two (2) years! On their first outing, they went bowling, out to eat, and perused a nearby hobby shop. The pair share quite a few common interests and hobbies with each other. They both enjoy video games, fishing and crabbing, technology, ax throwing, and music by Michael Jackson. John and Khalil also will get into just about anything together. Fishing and crabbing are their go-to activity. They will also refurbish old tools, fix things like a tractor, go bowling, attend hockey games, get their hair cut, go shopping, and even cut grass. When talking about cutting grass, John shared, “cutting grass may not seem like fun, but when you’re learning to ride a lawnmower, how to maintain it, troubleshoot any issues and then fix them, it can be fun with a great lesson.”
Khalil described his match with John by expressing, “John is good for me, and I am glad that he is my brother.” Octavia revealed, “John and Khalil’s connection has been important even outside their days together. Khalil’s attitude has changed, and he has started to be more accountable for his actions. John offers to help with handiwork around the house and always teaches Khalil as he goes about the work.”
When John was asked to describe his match with Khalil, he declared that he and Khalil are matched well: “Khalil has been committed to seeing me as often as I can see him. On average, we see each other once a week for about 4 hours. We work around our schedules and find the time to hang out. I have no doubt Khalil has learned something from me, but what I have learned from him and how he reminds me of me when I was his age; I often put myself in his shoes and ask myself, ‘was I like this when I was his age?’. Khalil makes me proud, and he humbles me. I compare myself to him and also remind myself that we are different; I think of what could have been presented to me when I was his age to make growing up better. I do my best to be the ear that listens, the voice that reasons, and the hand that helps. I have watched him grow into a young man the last few years, and with that, I try to treat him as such. Our relationship has evolved to calling each other by our last names once and a while. We have a great bond. I am grateful he has become my Brother.”
John and Octavia have an excellent partnership which sets a fantastic foundation for John and Khalil’s match. John described their relationship by stating, “Octavia and I get along well. She sets her children as her highest priority. I believe that sets a good foundation for Khalil and me. We communicate well, and that has helped establish trust between us. I keep her informed of what Khalil and I are doing and what our plans are. If there are any items of concern with Khalil, we let each other know. We are close in age, but I look at Octavia like a Mother. I am grateful she lets her oldest son hang out with me.”
Khalil is unsure what path he wants to take for education or career after graduating high school. John asserted that “I see a lot of potential in Khalil. I see him graduating college with a career in Software Engineering. Truly, I can see him as a Lawyer because he is soft-spoken with a loud voice. I see him with his own place and a beautiful family. The love that he shows me, his family, and his friends is genuine. I watch him learn new things and know some opportunities await him. He is smart, clever, and compassionate. If he applies these assets in all he does, he will be successful. I believe he will. I encourage college. Now more than ever, it is necessary for a successful future. I have explained to him how trade schools are an option if he wants to go into a specific trade instead of college. I want him to know all his options and how he can pursue anything he wants to do. I know that talking to him about his education and future, again and again, will get him thinking about what he wants to do and hopefully set him in a direction he believes he will be happiest.”
